Allowance for Kids' Chores: Yes or No?

Should you pay an allowance for kids' chores?

You won't be surprised to learn that parents are almost as divided about paying for chores as they are about chores themselves.

Some days, kids are so eager to help that they need no motivation at all. (Enjoy those days. Write them down.) Other days, serious incentives are required. Those come in two flavors: cash and noncash.

Here are the best arguments on both sides, how much to pay if you go the cash route, and the noncash rewards that work just as well, so you can decide what's right for your family.

The Case Against Paying for Kids' Chores

The anti-allowance parents make a persuasive case: kids shouldn't be paid to help around the house. It's their house, too.

Being part of a family means pitching in to make the home a better place for everyone to live. No compensation required.

Worse, they say, paying for chores gives kids the mistaken idea that chores are optional: "I'll skip my chores this week. I don't need the money."

The Case for Cold, Hard Cash

The pro-allowance parents make an even more persuasive case, if you ask me. (In the interest of full disclosure, I'm in their court.)

A tangible reward for kids' efforts motivates them to take on more jobs around the house. And in the real world, they point out, that's exactly how adults get paid for their work.

Best of all, money of their own gives kids a chance to learn about money early, while Mom and Dad are still around to talk it over.

A Lesson in Pokémon Economics

Here's an example. "Mom, please let me get those rare Pokémon cards," my son pleaded several years back. "In a few years, they'll be worth more than the $80 they're charging now."

Despite my repeated warnings that trendy items go out of style and their "value" tanks right along with them, he insisted on spending the birthday money he'd saved over two years on two cards.

I gave my reluctant blessing. I could see a lesson looming.

Sure enough, we recently tossed out those "rare and valuable" Pokémon cards while spring-cleaning his bedroom. He couldn't even give them away.

The sheepish look on his face as he threw them out told me he remembered our talk and regretted not taking my advice. I never had to open my mouth.

That's the upside of kids having their own money: they learn to save, they learn to resist impulse buys, and they learn what work is worth. Sometimes the hard way.

The Middle Ground: Base Chores Plus Paid Extras

Can't decide? Plenty of families split the difference.

•      Everyday chores are unpaid. Setting the table, feeding the dog, the nightly pickup. That's just being part of the family.

•      Extra jobs earn money. Washing the car, raking the whole yard, cleaning out the garage. The jobs you'd otherwise do yourself, or pay someone else to do.

This answers the anti-allowance argument (you don't get to skip family chores) and still teaches the money lessons. One more rule: personal virtues, like making your bed and brushing your teeth, never earn pay. Those come free with being a person.

How Much Allowance Should Kids Get?

A popular rule of thumb is $1 per week for every year of age, so a 6-year-old gets $6 a week and a 12-year-old gets $12. Adjust it for your budget and for what you expect the money to cover.

A Few Allowance Rules That Make It Work

 Pay on the same day every week. Payday is payday.

•      No chores, no pay. Otherwise it isn't payment. It's a subscription.

•      No advances. Welcome to the real world.

•      Use three jars: save, spend and give. Kids divide each payday among them.

•      Let them make mistakes. See: Pokémon cards.

Noncash Rewards for Kids' Chores

Rewards for a job well done don't have to be financial.

For little ones: stickers and stamps on a simple chore chart you make yourself go a long way. When they finish their chores, reward them with something fun, like lunch at their favorite spot (Mickey D's, anyone?) or a new storybook from the library or the bookstore.

For older kids: offer time with Mom or Dad. A father-son movie outing. Dinner at your daughter's favorite restaurant.

Those are big rewards, so save them for big jobs, like the spring cleaning. For smaller tasks, give your child a ticket for each one. Once they've collected 10 (or 20, or 50, your call), they can cash them in for a treat you've agreed on.

Make It Easy, Make It Fast, Make It Fun

Whether you pay an allowance or go cash-free, it's easier to get the family helping when cleaning is fun. And when kids are having fun, they clean longer and do a better job. It's pretty easy to make housecleaning fun, or at least less unfun. Here are my best ideas.

Make It a Family Affair

The key to a successful family cleaning routine is Mom and Dad joining in. When everyone's working, it's more fun.

Pump Up the Volume

Turn on upbeat music while you clean. Watch your kids howl while you do the Bump with the vacuum and the Macarena with the duster. You get the picture: a smiling crew making short work of housework. Fill the house with positive energy, not grumbling.

We rotate DJ duty in our house to keep the peace. Chris picks the tunes one week, and the next week it's Lyndsay's turn. Lyndsay loathes the Macarena, but Chris loves it. Lyndsay grooves to soulful '70s tunes while Chris covers his ears. But knowing they each get to choose every other week keeps them both content.

Be Saturday Morning Players

This saved-(or sunk)-by-the-lunch-bell approach is for the revolving-door family, whose weekly chores get sidetracked by tests, book reports, science projects, meetings and business trips.

Any assigned chores that don't get done during the week are due by noon on Saturday. Saturday morning becomes a high-speed race to the noontime finish line. (Mom note: never volunteer to drive the Saturday morning soccer carpool, so this can happen.)

Delegate Pride With the Room Monitor System

Each month, assign each family member a room as their point of pride. Every night before lights-out, they give their room the once-over to make sure it's in good shape. Give the little ones rooms that only get used after their bedtime, like the dining room.

At the end of the month, whoever kept the best room gets a special treat, like a family afternoon or night out of their choosing.

Plan a Cinderella Saturday

When a big cleanup day is necessary, the whole family puts on sweats and labors the day away, dragging rags and pails, à la Cinderella.

In the evening, with a wave of the fairy godmother's wand, everyone dresses up and goes out for dinner and a movie together.

Looking forward to a magical family night out makes even the longest chore list palatable, especially when you tackle it together.

(For more ways to get kids cleaning, see Getting Kids to Clean.)

It's Never Too Late to Start

The best approach to housekeeping with kids is to start training them as toddlers, so it never occurs to them that you can go to bed with toys on the floor. Picking up your things should be as automatic as brushing your teeth.

Parents of older kids will have to work a little harder to get their attention. But it can be done. Start with the right number of chores for each child's age: Chores for Kids by Age.

Frequently Asked Questions

Should you pay kids for doing chores?

It's your call. Paying an allowance teaches kids about money and work. Not paying teaches that pitching in is part of being a family. Many families do both: everyday chores are unpaid, and extra jobs earn money.

How much allowance should a child get?

A common rule of thumb is $1 a week for each year of age, so $8 a week for an 8-year-old. Adjust it for your budget and for what the allowance has to cover.

What age should kids start getting an allowance?

Around 4 or 5, once they can count coins and understand that money buys things. That's also a good age to start the save, spend and give jars.

What can I use instead of money to reward chores?

Stickers on a chore chart, tickets they trade in for a treat, a special outing, or one-on-one time with Mom or Dad.

Should you take away allowance for not doing chores?

If the allowance is payment for chores, yes. No chores, no pay. Be consistent, and tell them the rule ahead of time.

The Bottom Line

As the parent, paying an allowance for kids' chores is your call. Mom (or Dad) knows best, after all.

Keep Going

Payday's settled. Now put those chores in motion:

•      Chores for Kids by Age: Jobs for every room in the house, from toddlers to teens.

•      Daily Chores for Kids by Age: The everyday jobs that keep the house from sliding into chaos.

•      Weekly Chores for Kids by Age: Vacuuming, bathrooms, sheets and a sibling rotation.

•      Monthly Chores for Kids by Age: The bigger jobs, perfect for paid extras.

•      Teaching Kids Household Chores: The step-by-step method that makes chores stick.

•      Getting Kids to Clean: How to get toys picked up without a fight.

•      Yard Work With Kids: Outdoor chores by age, plus mower safety.

•      Pet Chores for Kids: Feeding, walking and the backyard poop patrol.

As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases.